One of the Few I Don't Like
Tonight, on the Mike & Sara Show:
(Sara sits at the desk, happily typing away to forum friends..)
Rustle, Rustle.
Sara: What the heck's making that noise in the closet?
(she gets up to investigate)
Sara: AAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!
(runs screaming down the hallway toward her bedroom, with the BAT THAT WAS IN HER CLOSET FOLLOWING HER THE ENTIRE WAY)
(Sara dives onto the bed, landing on a sleeping Mike, screaming the entire time)
Mike: WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU SMOKING?!?
Sara: THERE'S A BAT IN MY ROOM AND YOU HAVE TO GO GET IT OUT PLEASE GET IT OUT YOU HAVE TO KILL IT RIGHT NOW MAKE IT DEAD MAKE IT DEAD MAKE IT GO AWAY IT'S FLYING IT CHASED ME DOWN THE HALL.
Mike: Would you please just hold me and let's go to sleep?
Sara: MICHAEL THERE'S A BAT IN OUR HOUSE. WHAT IF IT HAS RABIES?!? GET IT OUT OF THERE. RIGHT NOW. MAKE IT GO AWAY KILL IT PUT IT OUTSIDE WHATEVER YOU HAVE TO DO MAKE IT GO AWAY.
Mike: (Sigh.) Stop yelling at me. Dammit, Sara.
(Mike leaves the room and goes down the hallway)
(Silence.)
THWACK.
THWACK.
THWACK.
THWACK.
THWACK.
(Sara is cowering in bed with the dog - who, by the way, is apparently completely useless when it comes to all things bat - and decides it's time to make sure her husband is still alive)
Sara: (peeks out of the bedroom door and down the hallway in time to see Mike playing baseball with the poor defenseless bat) WHAT ARE YOU DOING?!?
Mike: I'M KILLING THE (BLEEP)ING BAT LIKE YOU ASKED ME TO!
Sara: WHAT ARE YOU USING TO KILL IT?!?
(pause)
Sara: IS THAT ONE OF MY SCRAPBOOKS?!?
Mike: Well it kills every other damned thing, so I figured why should this be any different?
THWACK.
THWACK.
THWACK.
No more flying critter.
Conversation about what to do with the bat now that it's dead ensues; Mike votes leave it on the floor and let the cats deal with it, Sara votes FOR LOGIC - as in, hey, let's put it outside or in the trash or something.
Sara wins. For now.
(Sara sits at the desk, happily typing away to forum friends..)
Rustle, Rustle.
Sara: What the heck's making that noise in the closet?
(she gets up to investigate)
Sara: AAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!
(runs screaming down the hallway toward her bedroom, with the BAT THAT WAS IN HER CLOSET FOLLOWING HER THE ENTIRE WAY)
(Sara dives onto the bed, landing on a sleeping Mike, screaming the entire time)
Mike: WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU SMOKING?!?
Sara: THERE'S A BAT IN MY ROOM AND YOU HAVE TO GO GET IT OUT PLEASE GET IT OUT YOU HAVE TO KILL IT RIGHT NOW MAKE IT DEAD MAKE IT DEAD MAKE IT GO AWAY IT'S FLYING IT CHASED ME DOWN THE HALL.
Mike: Would you please just hold me and let's go to sleep?
Sara: MICHAEL THERE'S A BAT IN OUR HOUSE. WHAT IF IT HAS RABIES?!? GET IT OUT OF THERE. RIGHT NOW. MAKE IT GO AWAY KILL IT PUT IT OUTSIDE WHATEVER YOU HAVE TO DO MAKE IT GO AWAY.
Mike: (Sigh.) Stop yelling at me. Dammit, Sara.
(Mike leaves the room and goes down the hallway)
(Silence.)
THWACK.
THWACK.
THWACK.
THWACK.
THWACK.
(Sara is cowering in bed with the dog - who, by the way, is apparently completely useless when it comes to all things bat - and decides it's time to make sure her husband is still alive)
Sara: (peeks out of the bedroom door and down the hallway in time to see Mike playing baseball with the poor defenseless bat) WHAT ARE YOU DOING?!?
Mike: I'M KILLING THE (BLEEP)ING BAT LIKE YOU ASKED ME TO!
Sara: WHAT ARE YOU USING TO KILL IT?!?
(pause)
Sara: IS THAT ONE OF MY SCRAPBOOKS?!?
Mike: Well it kills every other damned thing, so I figured why should this be any different?
THWACK.
THWACK.
THWACK.
No more flying critter.
Conversation about what to do with the bat now that it's dead ensues; Mike votes leave it on the floor and let the cats deal with it, Sara votes FOR LOGIC - as in, hey, let's put it outside or in the trash or something.
Sara wins. For now.
9 Comments:
I'm still ROTFLMAO! I can just picture this scenario in my head.
Hee!
Oh.
My.
God.
Please tell me the scrapbook survived :)
HE USED A SCRAPBOOK!!!!!!!!!!
So are you going to play show n tell with the scrapbook on Sunday?
oh my, just, oh my...
A scrapbook? Oh NO!
LOL Sarah!
I just found this on you page.. That is the best story ever... I love you and miss you.
-Jenny
Laughing laughing laughing ... you tell such great stories!
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