Kindred Spirit
I love this woman. Never met her, so I guess that officially qualifies as stalking, but seriously. If ever there was a kindred spirit for me, she's it.
I was driving home this morning, and as usual, my head was cluttered. I was thinking about the "grieving" process I went through after Matt and I broke up, and how I dated all of these random guys and knew - I mean just *knew* - instinctively that they weren't for me. Most of the time, it had absolutely nothing to do with them. It had to do with the fact that I wasn't finished with my own journey. I knew that before I could be comfortable with someone like that, I had to be comfortable with myself. I also knew that once I stopped looking for someone, and started to just enjoy being Sara, I would end up falling in love.
Duh - that's exactly what happened. And OH MY WORD did it tick me off. I mean seriously.. I remember just being FURIOUS that Mike hadn't come along when I "needed" him, but when I was absolutely deliriously thrilled to be on my own. So it worked out ok in the end (alright, it's better than ok..), but the point is that until I accepted my own place in the world, there was no way I could be happy.
Alright, now if you're still here, we're fast-forwarding about 5 years. Here I am, driving home from work, realizing that there are so many things I need to do.
"Zion needs bunk beds," I think to myself (the kid isn't even two yet - bunk beds?!?).
"We really need a living room set.. I am so tired of our futons."
"The Renaissance Festival is coming up. I'd better start putting back money for my pictures." (yeah, cause I only have about 15 sitting in the closet that aren't even framed yet)
Somewhere around Raytown, it occurred to me that I am *never* going to be happy until I stop thinking about all of the "stuff" I don't have, and start realizing just how fortunate I am. Zion doesn't need bunk beds. We don't need furniture. I sure the heck don't need any more pictures of dragons. That doesn't mean that we won't go to Nebraska Furniture Mart in a month and look at bunk beds, or that we won't have a new sofa before Christmas, or that I won't come home from the Renaissance Festival with a carload of fairies riding the backs of dragons.
There is absolutely no reason for me to be WORRIED about it, though, for crying out loud. I have a warm house, an adorable son, a car that works (sometimes), FOUR JOBS (some people have none), a husband who, for some unknown reason, wants to spend time with me, and a network of extended family and friends that just about anyone would love to have.
Rhonna's quote for today?
"Joy is what happens to us when we allow ourselves to recognize how good things really are." Marianne Williamson
Did I say that I love this woman?
I was driving home this morning, and as usual, my head was cluttered. I was thinking about the "grieving" process I went through after Matt and I broke up, and how I dated all of these random guys and knew - I mean just *knew* - instinctively that they weren't for me. Most of the time, it had absolutely nothing to do with them. It had to do with the fact that I wasn't finished with my own journey. I knew that before I could be comfortable with someone like that, I had to be comfortable with myself. I also knew that once I stopped looking for someone, and started to just enjoy being Sara, I would end up falling in love.
Duh - that's exactly what happened. And OH MY WORD did it tick me off. I mean seriously.. I remember just being FURIOUS that Mike hadn't come along when I "needed" him, but when I was absolutely deliriously thrilled to be on my own. So it worked out ok in the end (alright, it's better than ok..), but the point is that until I accepted my own place in the world, there was no way I could be happy.
Alright, now if you're still here, we're fast-forwarding about 5 years. Here I am, driving home from work, realizing that there are so many things I need to do.
"Zion needs bunk beds," I think to myself (the kid isn't even two yet - bunk beds?!?).
"We really need a living room set.. I am so tired of our futons."
"The Renaissance Festival is coming up. I'd better start putting back money for my pictures." (yeah, cause I only have about 15 sitting in the closet that aren't even framed yet)
Somewhere around Raytown, it occurred to me that I am *never* going to be happy until I stop thinking about all of the "stuff" I don't have, and start realizing just how fortunate I am. Zion doesn't need bunk beds. We don't need furniture. I sure the heck don't need any more pictures of dragons. That doesn't mean that we won't go to Nebraska Furniture Mart in a month and look at bunk beds, or that we won't have a new sofa before Christmas, or that I won't come home from the Renaissance Festival with a carload of fairies riding the backs of dragons.
There is absolutely no reason for me to be WORRIED about it, though, for crying out loud. I have a warm house, an adorable son, a car that works (sometimes), FOUR JOBS (some people have none), a husband who, for some unknown reason, wants to spend time with me, and a network of extended family and friends that just about anyone would love to have.
Rhonna's quote for today?
"Joy is what happens to us when we allow ourselves to recognize how good things really are." Marianne Williamson
Did I say that I love this woman?
posted by SevenHappyScrappers at 12:45 AM
1 Comments:
No matter how much we have, it is human nature to want more, and want it right now. It takes a LOT of practice to learn the art of being grateful/thankful.
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